This photo is of New Year's Eve in Paris...wish I was there....but I am not so............................I was thinking about how New Years resolutions are odd. I mean it doesn't take New Years to find something about myself I want to work on.With that being said my resolutions:I want to read moreI want to gossip lessI want to just "BE"...

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I don't have a good poker face....

I like to think you can't tell what I am thinking by my expression, but sadly I think I may have inherited the exact lack of this ability from my mother. I can read her face like a book, actually like the front page headline of the newspaper. God love her you can see her emotions simultaneously as she feels them all over her face. I like to think I can not show judgement when I totally disagree with you, but I don't think I can....

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Trucking along

I am having a hard time today. Hard because I look back on the past six months and see how far I've come, but I can also see that I still have some more hills to conquer. And I know time is the key to the conquering. But in my true Lindsey fashion I just want it to be over, fixed and buried. I want to bulldoze the hills or just borrow someones vespa and get to the top already. I want to be looking backwards and say "that was hard...

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Merry Christmas

Well I learned yet another talent of Mr. Big Dog this morning. He can wrap, and I may say quite well. However, his hoarding habits have again reared their ugly face. He has a hoard of Christmas wrapping supplies that would put Martha Steward to shame. I did tease a bit about that, but then he put them to great use with his creations below....

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Advice for your budget

With the economy being so rotten, I know we are all trying to pinch our pennies and get the most out of our shopping. However, there are somethings I have realized you should not under any circumstances go cheap on! You get what you pay for and the more expensive is just worth it. So I am trying to save you any heartache out there....1. Ziploc bags.....case in point: When shaking Christmas chex mix in the bag to coat them with...

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No Christmas cards this year from this gal

This year I just couldn't bring myself to buy any Christmas cards to send out. If you're reading this and you are expecting one from me, sorry not this year. I promise next year it will be all the talk and the best one you've ever received but this year it's just not happening. Call it busyness, call it lack of motivation, or maybe just lack of inspiration. What kind of card do you send post divorce? It's not yesterday but not...

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The creativity gene

I have this theory, which I can strongly argue may be fact. My mother is one of the most creative people I know. Seriously, she can make a paper bag look like a million bucks. Once she made a spectacular table setting at my house with my things (she calls this shopping around your house) in just 20mins before Thanksgiving dinner and it looked like I spent a lot of money and planned it for hours. My sister and I joke (but even...

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The jacket addiction continues.....

So for those of you who may not know....Portland, Oregon is the home to the Nike Campus, Adidas Headquarters, and Columbia Sportswear. As a local you usually have a friend or a friend of a friend, or you're a nurse and your facility gets you these awesome passes for the employee stores around town. These stores are AMAZING! You can get stuff way cheaper and you can get stuff other people can't because it didn't make the cut for...

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Someone may have a problem.....a jacket problem that is

We did some self Christmas shopping at REI last night. Mr. Big Dog "needed" a new winter snow coat. "Needed" has been an ongoing discussion. I mean I like to point out my newer found appreciation for the things I really "need" in my life. Like family, friends, food, water, maybe a day to sit back and relax....you know things I need as opposed to "want". Sure I would love a trip to Hawaii or a pair of knee high black boots, but...

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Pick me up

"Remember, He does not see us the way we see ourselves; He sees us the way we are meant to be." This sentence gets me out of my head when I am hardest on myself. When I am going over regret and getting frustrated with myself about how I coulda, woulda, shoulda done something different. In the end I know I AM trying and everyday it gets easier to be a better me. To not have hate in my heart, to not judge others, and to just let...

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It's kinda like riding a bike....sorta...

Being raised 30 to 90 min's from awesome ski resorts at Tahoe I must say I was very spoiled growing up. Spoiled by the snow, by the weather, and my parents supporting my snow extracurriculars. And here and now I will say "THANK YOU, you gave me a hobby I continue to love. Thank you, thank you, thank you." My parents never really skied themselves but they wanted their kids to be involved in the sport of snow. First we skied,...

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Christmas in the house.....

Well I have my tree up and decorated and it's just the first week of December. I don't think I have ever been this organized in December in my life! I even has some gifts bought!!!I think this year I am a little more excited about the holiday. Last year I vaguely remember an argument about how messy Christmas trees were and how they really...

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My dirty little not so secret

My mom and sister surprised me with Vinny (named after Vincent Van Gogh) back in the Fall of 2001. He was a puppy and became my first dog. I took him everywhere with me, he was the life of every college party, has made several drives to the coast and Reno with me, and has seen just about every single dog park in the Portland/Metro area....

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Back on the wagon

Well every single time I am in my best physical shape I tell myself I won't slide again. I won't get off the workout wagon and I won't stop running. But it always seems that life happens, things get busy and other priorities start to dictate my days. So now here I am having to start over again. I ran last night on a treadmill for the first time since last spring. Don't get me wrong, I think the treadmill was a great invention...

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Never a boring day

So when I first started at my new job they did say that occasionally there would be prisoners that would be patients. Being the University hospital and really the big community hospital there is always a variety when it comes to the patient population. I have taken care of one prisoner before but he was just a thief who stole a car. He didn't...

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I want to work at a Christmas Tree lot

This may be a stupid fantasy, but I have always said I thought it would be fun to have a Christmas Tree farm and sell Christmas trees in the winter. I can just picture myself with one of my cute flower beanies and hot chocolate in hand helping someone pick the perfect tree. I haven't given into the fake tree craze mainly because I love the...

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Happy Thanksgiving

So today for the first time maybe ever....I went snowboarding on Thanksgiving. It was great! The company, the weather, just to be not at work was all great.And I packed us a Thanksgiving picnic:) Who says you can't have Thanksgiving while skiing?The Menu:Turkey sandwiches (fresh turkey cut at New Seasons deli to sandwich size slices just...

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Oh the weather outside is frightful.......

Actually growing up in Reno Nevada this this not very frightful...but Portlanders do seem to go into panic mode with any precipitation more severe and solid than rain. The hospital has been all a buzz worrying ahead of time about the possibility snow, because that means a possibility of people not being able to get to work. I think nurses should have that postal motto....rain or shine, sleet or hail......your nurse will get...

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Recipe for a good man

I have a girlfriend who told me if I wanted to find a good man I needed to write down everything I wanted in one. That I needed to be purposeful and really think about it.So in a playful moment with her I wrote my list down a couple months ago. It was really just a game or distraction to my everyday woes at the time. I really wanted to fast forward through the tough part of my divorce. The everyday occurrence of the panicky thought...

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Need I say more?

I swear I wish I was him right now. I am so tired from running between my two jobs and everyday life. Doesn't he look comfy?That chair is actually not too terribly large....he crams himself in it:) Just make yourself comfortable Jay......

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35,405 days and counting

I have a friend with a birthday today. She is turning 97 years old. She has been one of my dearest friends now for almost 10 years. She was my neighbor in college and I asked her to be my geriatric patient for a project in nursing school. It started out with a visit once a week to ask her medical history and ended up being a weekly afternoon date for tea. She is my adoptive great grandmother but really she's more of a friend....

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3/4 heart

I feel like my heart is 3/4 of the way there. There being my whole self intact. It's just this pesky 1/4 pops up at the most inopportune times. I am sure it is normal, I just don't like it.And I really don't like that I have no control over it. I just get this wave of frustration, like someone turned the light off for a split second and because of it I fell down a flight of stairs. Then the lights come back on and I am trying...

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Doggie day

Mr. Big dog was nice enough to let my three furry children and my mom's Big Yellow Dog (BYD) all come over for a visit today. While he finished some yard chores I decided to take on the challenge of walking them all. AT THE SAME TIME! That is 5 dogs, one being Mr. Big dog's Saint Bernard. Look how small my mom's yellow lab looks next to...

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Update on mass transit...

Well I have been taking the bus like I said I would. I did end up driving two days out of 7, and those just happen to be the days I was 10 mins late. I guess depending on the bus really makes you more organized and on time.I don't think to the naked eye you can tell I am a newbie to the big blue and white bus, but then again I am a newbie....

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Trick or treat give me something good to eat

These pictures are a couple years old but they crack me up:) Vinny was Elvis if you can't tell....doesn't he look thrilled about ...

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Bandaids

It's been 4 years since my family changed forever. And I looked hard at that tonight. Really hard. Look how far we have all come. Look how great it is that I can go out and meet my mom for dinner on a Friday night here in Portland, when I never thought she would move here. Instead of a phone call to Reno, Nevada I get to see her face to face. Look how we all dusted ourselves off and continued. Maybe with a couple bandaids in...

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Exhaustion or happiness?

I have been so gitty today...all day. I am talking craziness!!! I am laughing at myself, laughing with my hairdresser till I thought I might pee my pants and then talking to complete strangers and laughing hysterically. Part is definitely exhaustion. I have been working two jobs this week since I am training for the new part time gig and there is a fair amount of start up training( * just a part time hospital JOB to meet some...

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Thinking about a challenge

Well I am starting a new JOB this upcoming week:) It's just a little something for fun, I won't be quitting my real big girl job. However, there is a little bit of a challenge to this new place......parking. There is really no free parking, and the cost of the parking offered is astronomical. So I am taking the challenge of mass transit. Yes people I am going green and turning into a real live Portlander. I am going to challenge...

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Animal Planet

I have this knack for having my friends and family's dogs stay over. Today Sgt. Pepper, aka Pepper, is hanging out for the day so her mom and I can run this afternoon (traffic can be bad here so this way she doesn't have to go pick up Pep and head back here). The only problem is Pepper is scared of my laminate flooring, which I have throughout...

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Asking for directions

Have you ever been at a place in your life where you have absolutely no idea which way to go? Right, left, up, down, any direction....completely lost? Sometimes I feel like I don't even know my name let alone what I want. So lost and I am just trying to stay on the road or the path let alone know where I am even heading.Tonight I just want to let go. I want to let it all go and just let fate lead me. Why is that so hard? Why...

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It has been years since I carved a pumpkin. Mr. Big Dog and I hit up Winco for some cheap 17 cents a pound pumpkins the other night. We have had some fun dates for sure, I like how we do ordinary things like carve pumpkins:) Anyways, I have been waiting till mid month to carve them....so October 16th is mid month. I hate carving them the...

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Sick as a dog..

Yep, that's me. I finally did it. I pushed myself too far and now I am paying the price with mandatory down time. I am talking snotty nose, hoarse voice, smokers cough, and a head ache that actually might in the Guinness book of world records as the longest and most stubborn annoyance on earth. As I was feeling so gross and bad I started to think of the saying "sick as a dog." What does that really mean? Who said it first?...

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Walking mermaid

I think I am a different kind of girl. I do things my own way, usually the more difficult way but still my way. I think I am atypical with a lot of my hobbies (i.e junking, reading nursing magazines, dog parks). I like the saying "walking mermaid" because it is something that wouldn't happen and really would be rare if it did happen. An imaginary oxymoron if you will. Which is how I feel a lot lately. Like this oddity unusual...

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It's raining. It's pouring. The old man is snoring....

Today is the Portland Marathon, oh how I respect all the runners today! Not only is it 26.2 miles, IT IS POURING RAIN. I'm talking monsoon weather, fall is here! It's funny how different people have different opinions about rain. My mom says her thoughts here. And in the northwest we have a lot of it, especially in the Fall/Winter months. My love for rain has changed with my geography. Nevada rain is usually thunderstorm...

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This little train almost got off the track

Sometimes, okay maybe very often, I push myself to the point of too much. I work too much, then play too much, then just do too much. And then it hits me. I am so exhausted I feel horrible and just need to sleep. Yesterday was one of those days. I hit the wall around 3pm but still had to work until 7:30 which was not pretty. Mentally, physically, or emotionally:( I was in bed by 8:30 and I really don't think I even moved all...

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Fine China

I feel like a piece of china sitting out on display. I look okay from a far but when you really get up close you can see a bunch of little spider web cracks, even a chip or two missing. And even closer you would see that the lid doesn't even fit right. Its just kind of balancing on top...maybe it's not even the original lid, like I'm a sugar...

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Lazy Active Sunday

I love laid back days, even though I don't let myself have them often if ever anymore. I gotta keep moving for some reason....thinking if I stop I might never get started again.Here's the recipe for one of my perfect days.... Fall morning breakfast at homeHot shower, lazy dogs, pumpkin spice candle burningKung Fu churchCool car show with a handsome manWandered 23rd Ave for a secondWatched a movieHeirloom tomatoes with mozzarella...

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Last days of summer

There is this fountain down by the Library close to my house. I love driving or walking the dogs by in the summer and hearing the kids scream and laugh as they run through the water. It's like a giant sprinkler:) I personally had never walked through it or really gone too terribly close to it until my girlfriend called yesterday. She wanted...

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Just a shadow

Kind of weird how far I have come in only 106 days, or 15 weeks, or 3 months ago or so ago. Not that I am counting at all, really I just did the math today and thought how you can measure it in numbers. I also can measure it in feeling. I have a new attitude, some new friends, really kind of a new life. When you put a number on it, it doesn't...

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Do you really know what I do for a living?

I think some of the people in my life really do not understand what I do for a living. It's not their fault, it's just the way society has depicted nursing. And honestly, I had the some of the same thoughts about nursing in college when I started to think about changing my major sophomore year from Biology. "Who wants to clean people up all...

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I can see clearly now the rain is gone....

A couple of my friends and I keep discussing: Are you a glass half full or half empty kind of person? And how every situation can be interpreted one of two ways....positively or negatively. Your response to these situations are kind of built on a pro/con system....I mean usually you are thinking "If I open door 1, this will happen" or "But...

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Sara Stalker...or just a really big fan...

I know I may start sounding like a Sara stalker but I love the girl:) One of my besties and I went to see her tonight and she was fabulous. We got downtown early and found what we thought was "lucky" parking. It was 5.00 and just a block away from the venue. We pulled in and jumped out. Then gas station attendant/parking lot guy insisted...

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Sleepover...

Mr. Big Dog's little dog Jay is staying with me for a couple of days while he is out of town. When I say little I am being sarcastic. He is the complete opposite of little, he is huge. Actually he is 135lbs of hugeness. Which outweighs me. When asked, being the dog lover I am, I promptly answered "no problem." I mean he seems to be a large...

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