I feel like a piece of china sitting out on display. I look okay from a far but when you really get up close you can see a bunch of little spider web cracks, even a chip or two missing. And even closer you would see that the lid doesn't even fit right. Its just kind of balancing on top...maybe it's not even the original lid, like I'm a sugar bowl with a tea pot lid. Now I am sounding crazy, but I just love analogies I guess.
Maybe its just my own paranoia but I kind of feel like people close to me are at bay just kind of watching me. I look like the same sugar bowl, but they are watching to see "how I am, how I am progressing..good or bad", and if that lid is going to ever really fit right.
And for the most part I keep it together. I feel like I am living two lives some days. One happy and put together and one very beat up and kind of disheveled.
Really I think my china was damaged in the UPS box before it even got loaded onto the truck.
But damaged or not here I am, here I stand. I am still standing. And some days when the sun hits me just right you can see all my faults and flaws, but tonight I am the only one looking at my china and every part of it is as is should be. Right now, right here....every crack happened for a reason. And what is left now, is all that really matters.