Saturday, May 11, 2013

Well my little man is already 6 1/2 months old. Can you believe it? It flew by and all of the sudden I looked in the mirror and realized I AM this little boy's mother. This moment I had was surreal.  Like when you first get your driver's license and you are by yourself driving.....or when you moved into your first house as an adult, the first night you spent by yourself in it. It's this moment of.......really? I can't believe it! I am a mother...and I am THIS little boy's mother!!!which is the cherry on top. Some days I feel like I need to pinch myself because I just can't believe it still.

Asleep on the way to "our" weekly Saturday swim lessons......just a power nap before action time.

Back to being a mother.......
I don't think anyone or anything can prepare you for what it truly is to be a mother. I had no idea I would love someone so much and do absolutely anything for him. I didn't know I would have trouble sleeping if the night was extra cold outside just because I would worry he was too cold.....requiring me to sneak into his room and check the temperature. Or that I would rearrange my daily schedule just to let him sleep an extra 20mins soundly in his crib. I didn't know my Saturday night highlight would be giving him a bath and rocking him to sleep in my arms to a Disney lady and the tramp song until he gave me his unspoken cue of eye rubbing and a perfect yawn to say let's get me to my crib please.

I didn't know any of this.....but I always knew I was meant to be a mother. I just didn't know it would be of a baby made so perfectly for just for me.

When I was probably 3 months into motherhood I saw this commercial and fell to tears. I remember telling Mr. Big Dog in a blubbering mess of hormones that the TV was speaking to me. Which is funny now. Definitely not at the time...but now yes it is funny.
And I still have days where I feel like I am not very good at this mom gig, but those days are becoming fewer and farther between. I just tell myself to try again tomorrow at the end of the night, and I am trying to let go of being so hard on myself all the time.

The thing is.....I know I have earned this mother's day just like all of you other mother's out there.  And for that I am proud. I do what I do everyday because I love him and want the best for him.

And to really make it a first Mother's Day to remember we are going to run our first 5k together:) Our 5k with my little man in his stroller will be tomorrow at 830am and it's called Run like a Mother.

So happy Mother's Day to all of you out are all amazing, even when you really don't feel like it........ you are doing something extraordinary:)

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