Tuesday, January 28, 2014

My newest little is due in just 7 short weeks. EKKKK! How did that happen? I remember last pregnancy counting days and wishing it was the half way mark at like week 10. And now this time around it's blown by and I am feeling like just yesterday I was sharing the news with Mr. Big Dog that there were two pink lines on the pregnancy test.

So maybe it's having a toddler that makes the days melt by? Or maybe it's the holiday season in the middle with all the chaos and hustle and bustle?
Or maybe it's just a little bit of anxiety not really wanting to focus on this pregnancy 100% head on? Like not looking directly at the sun......maybe it's been a little too much to think about?
And then there is the thought of two under two years old, which is daunting for a lot of people including me. But women have done it for centuries right? Or maybe it's the thought of a delivery anything like my first (lets just say Scary with a capital S, days in the hospital, and blood transfusions do not sound warm and fuzzy to me). Whatever it has been, this pregnancy has flow by and I find myself a little panic stricken at times with "oh my, am I ready?"

But ready or not, the closer we get to this little making an appearance the more my faith seems to comfort me. Faith that it will all be okay and I am not in control really at all of any of it. What will be, will be. I will be taken care of and it will all fall into place as it did last time. My little family will be okay and taken care of.
My fears and frets are filled with my hope and prayers that my little mister will not feel neglected or too shocked by the new addition to our family. My worries are substituted with a simple prayer that he knows how much we love him and will continue to feel it with sharing his parents with a little baby. And I have reassurance that everything will go as safely as possible and I will bounce back because I did last time and it all worked out.

We have had a lot of hiccups the past month or so with many decisions that have needed to be made. Financial decisions, scheduling decisions, thoughts and plans about our little family and what is best for it with our upcoming growth spurt of one more little person with the same last name.

 And in the end, having faith it will all work out ultimately is what saves us over and over again. Saves us from worthless worry. Saves us from stress and anxiety. And just helps us keep in perspective that we are not driving this bus of life. We can only do so much, wish and pray for so much and basically show up ready to take on whatever this life hands us.

The rest is in HIS hands as it should be.

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