Lately, I have been trying to not let stress get me too riled up. But it is so easy to do when you loose faith even a little. I'm in this constant battle in my head with "everything happens as it's supposed to" and "oh no! maybe I should do A, B, and C in hopes I get D!"
I'm sure it's normal to have a little bit of anxiety when you're pregnant. Like stress about whether or not I will work full time once the baby comes? should we try to renovate the bathroom before the bundle gets here? NAMES?!!!! Will I be a good mom? the list goes on and on......
But really when I sit back and think....."you know if you just relax, it will all be okay." I know I let more of GOD's will in, and I don't have to make these bigger decisions alone. I know everything I have EVER forced, did not work out. I have learned a lot the hard way and also sometimes the more painful way. And I know I can handle whatever is thrown my way with the support of GOD and my husband.
That does not mean this is not a daily battle. And I now am realizing I worry about the wrong things.
Like what people will think about my decisions. Like what people will think about OUR decisions. I have people in my life that can be judgmental and don't necessarily think letting things just "happen" is the way approach certain life decisions.
But I do know that just because I don't have kids, doesn't mean I don't know anything....but sure I can learn a thing or two:)
Just because financially I can stay at home with my baby....doesn't mean I necessarily will full time....who knows how and what situation my family will be in 6 months from now, plus the 3 month maternity leave is actually 9 months:) Oh and Mr. Big Dog gets paternity leave too, so if we overlap who knows how long till I really would have to address this. Plus NOTHING is permanent:) My point is this stress if for nothing because no decision needs to be made right this second:)
Whatever name I choose will be perfect.
The bathroom is just another room in my house at the end of the day.
People can judge me all they want, but in the end I really only care about how I look in one person's eyes......GOD.
I know if I do the best I can, let His will happen, then everything will always be as it's supposed to be.
Now if only I could truly live this motto second to second, oh the stress I would eliminate!
Oh well, I am only human:) And all I can do, is the best I can do:)